“My husband has little to no interest in being intimate with me although I believe he loves me very much. How do I handle this? Do I ask him point blank what the issue is (although I’m afraid of the answer) or do I take my concern to God in prayer and believe in a positive outcome?”
Let me start by admitting I am making an assumption that you are referring to sex when you use the term intimacy. I am also guessing that this is a new pattern in your relationship and not how it has always been. I’ll approach your question as if that is the case but will offer some advice regarding intimacy outside of intercourse as well.
Sexual intimacy is an important part of the marital relationship and each couple has their own unique way of engaging with each other sexually. Sexual activities and frequency don’t have to look the same in one couple’s home as it does in another’s for them to be happy, healthy, and satisfied. For that matter, all forms of intimacy will vary from couple to couple. However, it is important for every couple to be on the same page with one another about what a healthy and fulfilling sex life looks like for them and how to appropriately display affection for one another outside of the marriage bed.
Paul informs us in 1 Corinthians 7, that both men and women should have their sexual needs attended to, lest temptation becomes an issue. Husbands are instructed in Ephesians 5 to nurture and cherish their wives and to strive to meet their ongoing needs. Lovemaking, sexual or otherwise, is not optional for believers. This is equally true for men and women. If I read the question correctly, intercourse is not a part of your intimacy right now, but that doesn’t mean your relationship has to lack closeness and caring. Conversation and compassion are also integral components of lovemaking. Talking to him about it is not an option, it is your obligation as a wife and you must prepare your heart and mind for these conversations with some focused, individual prayer time.
“Husbands and wives should be fair with each other about having sex. A wife belongs to her husband instead of to herself, and a husband belongs to his wife instead of to himself. So don’t refuse sex to each other, unless you agree not to have sex for a little while, in order to spend time in prayer. Then Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1 Corinthians 7:3-5, CEV)
When you pray, remember to ask God to soften your heart and that of your husband so that he does not become defensive and that you are not judgmental. Be patient with yourself and with him. Also, be prepared to gain understanding and make changes one conversation at a time. This season in your lives probably didn’t happen overnight. Itlikelycan’t be corrected overnight either.
There are a number of different explanations for what may have caused his apparent lack of interest. He may have physical or hormonal problems. There could be psychological issues. This could be a side effect of a new medication. He may be having his needs met elsewhere. Maybe he perceives a lack of interest from you. Whatever the “why” of it is, this may only be a contemporary change in his libido and/or desire to demonstrate his affection and not necessarily your new reality. No matter what the reason is, please remember that your husband is not the problem. You are not the problem either. The two of you have a common problem that requires your joint effort to overcome.
To reiterate and answer your question directly, don’t think that talking with your spouse and talking to God are mutually exclusive. Step 1 is to talk to your heavenly Father. Step 2 is to talk with your husband. Step 3is to repeat steps 1 and 2 until death does you part.